gaslight/syzygy
i don't think i asked for this it feels dangerous
Gaslighting is a psychological manipulation technique that involves convincing someone that their reality is untrue. Oftentimes, a person who is gaslighting another is not even aware they are doing it. But many times, they are.
It is largely a technique used to get needs met - needs that we are too ashamed to admit we have. When we gaslight (no one is blameless, we have all done it at least once in our lives, whether consciously or not), it makes it as if we can pretend we are not needing the thing we are needing—a deep lie to the self. A tragedy. The experience of being gaslit is like being thrown into the wind with a blind fold on - you lose your sense of where the ground is. who you are. What you believe to be true.
Take a moment - be honest. When have you gaslit someone? Who has gaslit you? What needs are you noticing being hidden in both these instances? What would it be like to honor those needs instead?
Where I live, the streets are lined with gaslights and the flames lap in such unpredictable patterns. You never know where the fire will flicker next- much like the experience of being gaslit. The gas required to keep these lamps lit is incredibly toxic. When the flame is not ignited, the fumes have the power to kill humans very quickly—and they are odorless, just as sneaky as the psychological version. Just as deadly.
(shot on film by Katelyn White)
Gaslight is a sound spell that eradicates self-doubt by naming the demons at hand. This allows us to take agency of the uncertainty and find our footing again. The act of naming an oppressive force immediately creates space between the victim of the energy vampire and the vampire itself. Within this space, power can be found and balance can be restored.
Reclaiming the truth is the key.
The word syzygy comes from the Ancient Greek word suzugía, which means “union” or “yoking”. In astronomy, a syzygy is when three or more celestial bodies line up in a roughly straight line. For example, during a new or full moon, the Earth, Sun, and Moon are in alignment, which is a syzygy.
Syzygy is a sound portal acknowledging the unions we have to our partners’ past connections, even without sharing physical space or time. What does it mean to be connected to every lover’s past lover? The invisible lines that knit us together and have an impact on our emotions and decisions.
Both of these songs were released last week on December 4th with the Full moon in Gemini. Gemini is the sign of the twins, hence the two sound portals on one moon.
To celebrate the release of these songs, visual artist Mónica Félix and I teamed up to offer a special one-night-only intimate transmission in the basement of an art gallery on the LES. A full band soundbath performance of these two sound portals, paired with her video projections moving through the experience of gaslighting in a friendship. The endeavor was to alchemize the pain around being gaslit into the strength to step forward bravely and reclaim the truth.
Processing pain in community is the most powerful way to heal, and it was incredibly meaningful to move through this with the people who were in the room. Hearing everyone’s stories of being gaslit, overcoming it, and how the experience made them feel was so meaningful and gave me hope. I will not soon forget this sweet, intimate night.
The energy of this week is wily, intense, crazed and unstable. These songs embrace that energy and are meant to cathartically express these sensations to liberate you. So you can step forward in acknowledging truth. So you can move forward with agency. If you feel this, if it speaks to you - I ask that you please share these with a friend who might need the same.
STOCKING STUFFERS! :)
The Seventh Gate beanie is a great option to keep your loved one’s third eye warm this winter. Sealed with the bespoke sigil for the project, the beanie ensures these loved ones are carrying a protective spell on their heads at all times! Placed there by me! :)
Thank you as always for listening and showing up with your meatsuits.
Here are the next gatherings:
DEC 11th 6pm Holiday Chill Soundbath Om on the Range in Chicago (SELLING FAST!)
DEC 13, 15, 18 Del Rio Opera Nights in Highwood, IL
DEC 20th Vinyasa Class at 105F in Chicago
DEC 24th Soprano Soloist Christmas Eve Old First Church Brooklyn
DEC 25th Soprano Soloist Christmas Day Old First Church Brooklyn
See you soon.
E